Highly strained and drained

These past few days have been highly emotional...Joshua has been lashing out at me verbally and it has broken my heart that he thinks so lowly of me.....

In the end I snapped , I couldn`t take his verbal abuse any longer and as a last resort I rang his father to come and take him.....Joshua didn`t think I would do it but he pushed me to the brink....

I`ve never seen such a turn around as I witnessed that night....He was sorry blah blah blah....The damage was done....His father didn`t end up taking him but did speak with him.....Gave his thoughts on the matter at hand and basically said the same thing as I have been saying....

For now I am trying to get everything out of my mind....I have been taking my frustrations out with housework....Those jobs that you put off doing....mainly washing down walls....Moving furniture around and throwing unused items out.....

Thankfully two of the kids start back at school tomorrow and Joshua returns on Wednesday....This will hopefully give me a chance to recharge and think about things a little clearer......

I`ve had so much to deal with this past week....My mother in laws health, my husbands health and now Joshua....They say things come in 3`s....Looks like it`s here....

Big decisions over the next few days

After we had the police involved my son and his g/f were finally located and eventually they came home by their own free will..... The reasons for their running away was that the g/f is pregnant....Now there is the dilemma of two 15 year old kids adamant about bringing this little baby into the world..... Normally I would be ok with this BUT both of these kids are far from mature enough to be able to cope with such a major task of bringing up a baby.... After much talking with the pair of them it was decided by all parents that they be seperated for a few days so that there is no pressure from either one of them....We get the feeling that my son is the one who is putting the pressure on the g/f to keep the baby for his own benefit and not that of the childs....... You see I know for a fact that firstly my son doesn`t want to go back to school.....Then there is RULES.....He doesn`t want to live by my rules and he wants to be able to do what he wants when he wants without consequences......And finally MONEY.....He can move out of home (so he thinks) claim centrelink payments without having to lift a finger .....The writing is on the wall.....It has become ALL too clear what it`s about with him..... And who will suffer from his selfishness.....The baby, the g/f and the grandparents...... So now it has been left up to the g/f and her parents as to where they go from here.....I`ve told my son he isn`t in the picture now.....Big decisions have to be made and unfortunately he has no say in the matter..... Of course he isn`t happy about it because this wasn`t in his plans.....He is moping around now because he is out of the loop ... Now i`m on 24 hour watch to make sure that he doesn`t do another runner......I`m mentally and physically exhausted and am afraid that it`s only going to get worse before it gets better.....

i`m an absolute mess

I sit here in the early hours of the morning and think to myself "where did I go wrong"????

What did I do that was so bad to be treated this way????.....

My teenage son Joshua has run away from home with his girlfriend.....They were last seen at the bus stop this afternoon and no one has heard or seen from them since....

I`m sick from worry...

And the worst part is I didn`t see it coming...There has been no indication that he wasn`t happy at home, nothing!!!!!

Now I blame myself.....I don`t know where to look, how to contact his friends, nothing....

I feel absolutely usless, powerless to fix it......

His mobile and the girlfriends mobiles are turned off and they have shut everyone out....

Then I had to deal with a drunken ex husband saying "what`s going on at home"???....What did you do to him??? Blah blah blah.....No frigging help what so ever except to make me feel 10 times worse than what I already am.....

The mother of the girlfriend and I have put out a missing persons report with the police and now we just wait....I`m climbing the walls, frantic and just praying that no harm has come to them....

I just need to know that they are ok.....

The best of friends

Who would have thought that the kitten would slot into the family as easily as she has...

Hobbles adores her....They run through the house (both of them) like maniacs.....Because hobbles has only one front leg the cat has the upper paw.....He can`t get traction and skids across the floor and that`s when Puss (yes original name isn`t it) attacks....lol....Hobbles is in his glory now as he has a play mate....His mum is getting on now and doesn`t tolerate much in his playful mode but Puss, omg they are both in their element....

This is the end result after having a run around through the house....Cute aren`t they...lol...I`m sure this cat will grow up like our last cat thinking it is a dog......

Out with the old and in with the new

I`ve come to the conclusion that this year will be a year of getting rid of the old and bringing in the new.....

So this year i`m actually saving my pennies....I`m debt free now and got rid of those nasty credit cards....They can be such a burden once you have them..Never am I going down that path again....They are too handy!!!!!

Now that the slate is clean theoretically I should be able to save....On paper anyway..lol

For quite some time I have been wanting to upgrade in the furniture department...The kids are now old enough to appreciate their surroundings so I feel it`s a good time to start throwing out old furniture and replacing it with the more modern, up beat, today`s type of furniture....

I`ve been slowly buying bits and pieces for our lounge room like ottomans (foot rests) and a new 12 cube shelf for storage.....I must start downsizing....With all the nic nacs ect it really is getting out of hand...Plus it will cut down the dusting and I am definitely not one who likes dusting..In fact I loathe it....

I`ve chosen black and white for my colour scheme in the lounge room...Safe colours that are easily available....Plus black is so much easier to keep clean.....White on the other hand, well the kids will just have to be careful otherwise they`ll have a rampant mother...lol

One month in and touch wood everything is going along tp plan....Let`s see how it goes further down the track....

Summer has arrived in SA with a vengeance

The last few days has definitely been good swimming weather...So much so , that even I had a dip in the pool so it must have been hot...lol

But alas there is always a down side to this kind of weather....Firstly it`s killing my plants....Someone forgot to move them from the suns rays and now they are burnt to a crisp.....In fact so are the kids.....It doesn`t matter how much sunscreen you put on , with 41 degree days it just melts the sun screen straight off....

Secondly it does not agree with hubby at all.....Even though today has been a good day....Out of bed for the first time in weeks....Since we have had the second air conditioner installed it has made the house a lot more comfortable for him....Money well spent I believe.....

And speaking of money, there isn`t much of it at the moment...Kids are due back at school in a weeks time which can only mean one thing....School fees are due.....OMG!!!!!

No such thing as a free education these days.....

I sowed and am now reaping the benefits

I thought I would show you how my vegies and fruit tree are looking....I just made a ham and tomatoes sandwich, home grown tomato naturally and it was delicious....I have picked so many already and looks like i`ll be out there picking some more.....A great excuse for having salads...

The nectarines I would say still have a week or two of ripening time........The birds had better not beat me too them....

And this lonesome guy is celery...I`ve never tried to grow this before but after a slow start it seems to be coming along just nicely...

Sorry Fran, I know you`re having a hard time with your lot but perserverance and patience.....The funny thing is I haven`t staked any of the tomatoes...They are just running wild and still producing....

It`s been a growers paradise

For the last two days I have been cutting and pitting plums....I have stewed them, I have made plum pies and this is my new creation, plum cheese cake,,,,I made 2......The first one I used uncooked plums and was quite surprised that it tasted good....

The second cheesecake I made I used the stewed fruit and omg i sneaked a taste and it`s devine....In future I will definitely be using the stewed version....

Starry was kind enough to share a plum cake recipe with me today so guess who`ll be busy baking again....lol....Tomorrow will be the last day for baking...3 days in a row now and I can honestly say i`m sick of it....Any left over fruit will be stewed and frozen for a later date....

The kids sure won`t be short on sweets for a while....

I am pleased with the amount of fruit we managed to get from two branches....Yes only two....They were packed full, so much so that the branches were getting awfully close to the ground....I covered them with netting to prevent the birds from eating them this year...Last year they had a field day and we were lucky to get a bucket full...Sorry birdies but it was our turn this year....

The vegie patch is also extremely productive....Cherry tomatoes galore and apple cucumbers growing quite well....I`ve never had much luck with the cucumbers but this year is a different story...